My my my, is my baby even the same baby?! It's truly amazing how much a new baby changes in looks in such a short period of time! It almost makes me sad, because she does not look anything like the baby I brought home. The past 6 weeks are almost a blur. It has gone by sooo fast, its hard to really remember everything about her: what she looked like, how she acted. I was just thinking about how I can't remember getting up with her during the nights the first couple of weeks.. ?? I know that I was still in pain and sore, and I know that it was difficult getting up and down, so you would think I would remember having to get up and down alot to feed her.. but I really can't picture it at all! crazy! I know I did, because she sure has not gone hungry! I know she has gained a good 4 lbs since she has been born (I would say that's a lot!)!
I just wish I could remember everything perfectly so that I won't ever forget these wonderful weeks I have had with her!
... Now its back to work! Work.. has it already been 6 weeks? Back to reality! As much as I have enjoyed sitting around and staring at my beautiful baby.. I'm feeling very unproductive! haha. Even though I am ready to get back to work, and that is only because I am fortunate enough to be able to take my baby to work AND her be in my class!- otherwise, I would be dreading it!, I'm a little worried how this first week or two are going to be?! Her feeding schedule is not always very consistent, so I'm afraid she is going to need to eat as I'm getting ready, or right when I get to work, which will make things difficult as there are things I need to do right when I get there! Hopefully it will go smoothly. And hopefully Aubrey will not be too jealous when I have to take care of other babies too :)
So far, being a mom has been great! To be completely honest, for about the first 4 weeks, it didn't really hit me that I was a mom. Like, I knew she was mine, and I did automatically have a huge love for her, but.. it was like I was just going through the motions. I hope this doesn't sound awful, I have talked to some other moms, and some felt the same way. Its not that I didn't want her or anything like that, .. I don't know, its kind of hard to explain. But, its like all of a sudden everything changed. My love for her has gone a thousand times stronger (if that is even possible, since I already feel like I loved her to the brim!) I feel hugely protective over her, I just can't get enough of her. I really feel like a mom now. I guess no one tells you that you might feel different from the way you supposedly should. Your emotions are all over the place. I hope this doesn't freak anyone out, or think that I'm crazy or a bad mom.. its just stuff you have to adjust to I guess. But I am loving every minute of it!!
So, I took her to the church nursery for the first time this past Sunday. My church is really big, so their nursery is pretty busy and full. They have this huge system and process of getting into the classes, I even have a photo ID badge! With all this said, you would assume the teachers should be well equipped... well, I will just say I didn't have the best experience. Once I was brought into her classroom the teachers introduced themselves and showed me which bed could be hers, so far so good, (by the way, Sarah is with me holding Aubrey) so while Sarah is getting Aubrey situated, the other lady is telling me what to fill out and a bunch of other stuff, the teachers ask how she likes to sleep, I say on her side or back (which babies are supposed to sleep that way until they are able to roll themselves over, no stomachs.) I tell them, and write down, when she ate and how much. I told them that she wouldn't need to eat, but if she woke up and was real fussy they could feed her. And on the sheet that clips on her bed, there is a place to write when she ate and was changed. ... So, I felt like there was alot going on as I was dropping her off and just kinda overwhelmed. But I figured everything would be good. So off I went. So, I come back to get her.. both teachers are sitting down, I know one was holding a baby but I'm not sure about the other one, anyway, they say "we layed her down after she ate.. I guess she's waking up now" they say this because she is laying in her bed crying.. on her stomach!! And her crying was not an "oh I just woke up cry" it was an "I'm so uncomfortable, someone help me!" cry! :( not happy! so I pick her up.. and her headband is missing, I start looking all around for it and the teachers never ask if I was looking for something, so finally I asked if they knew where it was, one teacher said she never saw it, the other one said she saw it but didn't know where it was. thanks for the help! So.. I grab the paper and go. I look at the paper, nowhere did they write when she ate or if she was changed! annoyed again. so we go to lunch after church and I go to change her.. she has leaked through her now 5 lb diaper.. there is no way she would have peed that much after that one bottle! so.. no diaper change?! ugh! As a first time mom, and being a first timer in that class, they did not do much to make me feel comfortable!! Perhaps I'm overreacting.. but I don't really think so! :) now, I don't know what to do, I don't really want to take her to sunday school and service with me.. but do I leave her there again? I may try one more time, but make sure I explain myself really well, and tell them to make sure they write down when she eats and is changed! .. sigh..
(I didn't think I was going to write so much, sorry! :) )
Ok.. On to a happier note, pictures!
Well, I'm having some issues with these pictures.. I uploaded more, but they aren't on my post, and they aren't where I want them..? But.. these are from her first day to the park! she loved it! With her is her crazy cousin Collin, he wanted to push her the whole time! :)
Ok, well, I will try to figure out how to get these other ones on her eventually.
Love ya! :)
